I seem to have left my pride at pride
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
this just has baby written all over it
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I need moral support for this bender
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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