State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
These tits shall not be calmed
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize