Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize