Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
