Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
