I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now