I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Who did Billy Mays play for?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
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