wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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