Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
