I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
