It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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