We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
