i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Every concussion has its silver lining
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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