She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Your penis caused this!
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
