i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
