I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
