Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
