I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
You were trust falling into bushes
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Randomize
