I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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