Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
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