So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
