So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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