Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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