either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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