Plan B is the new Plan A
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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