okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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