You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
