The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
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