apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
