i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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