Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
