I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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