i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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