i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Randomize
