I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize