fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
