apparently the secret to your success is patron
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I understand Curling. That high.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
