Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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