why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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