You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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