So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize