i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
