wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
