So how was he last night?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
it's like iHOP with fire
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text