38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
You've changed since you got that strap on
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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