It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
