you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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