Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
