i can't believe i had my finger in that
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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