Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I bet he comes in French.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
