Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
accomplished twins. life is a go
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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